I have been fat for as long as I can remember. I was aware of it even in Primary School, comparing myself to my friends with their super flat tummies and outy belly buttons. In High School I was always chunky. Never the biggest in my class, but bigger than most. Enough that I noticed but never did anything about it.
I didn't start dieting though until after College. I don't even remember ever weighing myself before then. I had started working at Greggs The Bakers of a weekend when I was 16 for some pocket money and with it came 50% off cakes, pasties and sandwiches. I remember taking bags of cakes home every weekend. Some for my family, most for me, and I would sneak them in to my bedroom and gorge myself. By 17 I must have noticed I put on weight because I joined Slimming World with my mum weighing in at 13st 11lbs. It only took me 6 months of following the plan and daily exercise to get down to 11st and a size 12 (from a size 16). This is the happiest with my weight I ever remember being as an adult. I felt comfortable and I wasn't skinny but I'm ok with that!
Unfortunately, after a couple of years and a new relationship I had gone back up to 12 stone. I hovered around this weight for a looooooong time until, aged 24, me and my then boyfriend booked a holiday to Mexico and I decided I should lose some weight again. I really would like some feedback on if this is only me being mental or if it is something a lot of people do; I dieted, went to the gym, lost a bit of weight but then when I stopped eating healthily it's like I went the opposite way and gorged again like I was trying to get in all the bad food I could before I started my next diet. This is something I am struggling to overcome to this day. I ended up weighing more by the time my holiday rolled round than when I started dieting. By time I got back off holiday I weighed 13st 10lbs.
I had tried Slimming World on and off over the years but could never get back in to it so in January 2012 aged 24 I started Weight Watchers for the first time and fell in love! First weigh in I was 14st 5.5lbs. By 12th May 2012 I had got down to 12st exactly and went on holiday to Magalluf feeling amazing where I met my now husband :D
So my weight fluctuated a bit that first year but I tried to stay in control, on and off WW, yo yo-ing again but never got too out of control until lo and behold I tried to lose some weight for my wedding in August 2013, failed, went the opposite way and got married at 13st 10lbs. I looked and felt terrible. Ffs Zoe!!
3 week honeymoon in Florida, Christmas etc etc and I entered 2014 at 15st 2lbs. My heaviest EVER and way too big for my 5'5" frame.
Managed to lose 21lbs in the first half of 2014, went off the rails and started 2015 at 14st 9lbs having put on a stone of what I had lost.
THIS IS THE LAST TIME!
This year I feel more in control than ever. I have had days off plan, nights out, holidays, weekends away, stressful days, sad days, can't be arsed days but I have ALWAYS got straight back on plan, have never felt out of control and for the first time in a long time I really feel like I can do this! I currently weigh 12st 9lbs. I would like to get down to 10st ideally but just to see the 11's again would make me feel amazing!
I have so many things on the last 6 weeks including 2 weekends away, my birthday, a friend's wedding, my dad's birthday, nights out, etc so I have been off plan every weekend but I get straight back on it on Monday and so far I haven't gained a bean! It's a good feeling and after my husband's birthday this weekend I am hoping I can get back to losing again!
Anywho if you got this far, well done! I should have started this blog 6 months ago but I am going to try to keep posting, give you some good meal and snack ideas and hopefully you will see me get to target at some point. I can do this!!!
Zoe x
No comments:
Post a Comment